imabitch: December 2005

Saturday, December 31, 2005

There's so many things happening, I just dont know where to start.

It just hit me, how I've been taking
so many things around me for granted.
My family especially.

The twins I haven't been showing much care/concern for.
And, the parents I haven't been showing much respect for lately.

Mom called earlier to ask how I was, and at the same time,
tell me that one of my sister was so sick til
the inside of her eyes started bleeding.

For that point in time, I was worried sick.
I was home with that sister of mine before I left the house.
I knew she wasn't feeling well, but I gave no shit.
Instead, I was disturbing her while she was sleeping.
I didnt even know her eye was bleeding.

And I am her oldest sister.
OLDEST, and I'm ashamed to be one.

I realised, I've always treated my friends as top priority.
When my friends are down, I'm always there for them.
When my friends are in need, I'm always there for them.
When I have arguements or fights with my friends, I get upset.
Friends birthdays - I go shop for presents.
Christmas - Shop for presents for them.

Its always FRIENDS, FRIENDS, FRIENDS!

I don't know anything bout my sisters.
I don't know when they're down,
I don't know when they need someone badly,
I don't know what they like,
I don't buy them gifts for them,
be it, for christmas or birthday.

I'm sorry I haven't been a perfect sister.
As much as I'd like to be,
I hope you'll give me the chance to.

Cos from the bottom of my heart,
you'll do know - I LOVE YOU'LL
And nothings ever gonna change that.
I apologise for the times I've hurt you'll,
be it through words or actions.

And sometimes I wish,
my parents could just respect my decisions.
I know they care for me, they love me,
but all I ask is for them to respect
the decisions I make in my life.
Yes, it may not be appealing to them.
But once again, its my life.

I love all of them - Mommy, Daddy, Felicia and Gillian.
I really do, I wish 2006 would be a better year for us.

-

2005 is coming to an end.
So much has changed over the year,
The new friends I've made,
some friends I'd lost,
how I dreaded sec3 life all over again,
how I couldnt accept the fact - sec3 again,
how I missed my old class,
how they all graduated,
and now I'm finally getting to sec4

I made many mistakes that have left an imprint in my life,
some of which can never be erased.

I've been so used to the usual faces in school
- Bea, Nora, Donn, Ally, Shayna, Evan, Jasper,
Belle, Nat, Gayle, Sheryl, Lizzy etc.

I have no idea how I'm going to get used to the drastic change.
It'll be different! I wont be seeing those familiar faces in
school no more.

No more recesses spent with them,
no more time spent with them.
Everyone will be heading off to different directions,
leading their own lives.

I'll be busy preparing for O's,
I wont have time to meet up?

I highly doubt we'll meet up,
who knows by then they might have long forgotten bout me.

Argh FUCK.

Friday, December 30, 2005

Spending time with my girls these few days
just made me realise how far we've come, together.
From our blue pinnafoes to our white blouses and belts.
The obstacles we went through
How far we've come, and
how much we've grown.

Now, life throws new obstacles in our lives
and as we all venture down different roads
I just hope and pray, we'll never forget
the good times we've spent together.
And perhaps, meet up every now and then.

-

Anyway!
I don't know what's with me lately.
I've been puking lately.
I've lost my appetite.
I feel like puking at
the sight of food.

My stomach's been feeling bad.
Argh FUCK.

-

Nothing's making it better.
No words can come close to what I'm feeling.

For those irreplacable moments, she was in my life
The smiles, the laughters she brought into my life,
lighting up every single day of my life.

I miss her,
I miss the fun and laughter she brought into my life,
I hate the fact that she is so far away, and I
have absolutely no idea how to contact her at all,
I hate the fact that our schedules keep clashing.

I just feel absolutely terrible,
TERRIBLE!

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Went looking for my green/brown dunks today.
Didnt managed to find a suitable one,
but there definitely were nice ones.

I'll most probably end up with
the limited edition brown one.
I'll see how.

Anyway!
The twins went out today, to get their shoes too.
One bought the dirty green converse sneakers which
I wanted and, the other bought a dirty grey one.

Damn, I need to go shoe shopping!

Christmas gathering/dinner/exchanging of presents/stayover
over at my place yesterday! It went all well! : )

Thanks: Nora, Shayna, Evan, Carrie, Rachel, Sheryl, Sheila, Belle, Peiyee etc.
It was great catching up with all of you guys.
Thanks for the lovely presents! :D

Shayna, Sheila, Carrie and Sher stayed over.
And I have to admit, it was one of the bestest stayover!
The thrills and tension we all had to go through!
Yes, it was scary but now when I come to think of
it, it was actually quite fun!
Anw, I shant go into details.

But theres one thing I can't help, but blog.
Shayna got into a cab sometime about 5 plus in the morning.

Taxi driver: Where you going?

Shayna: Just go straight
.
.
.
Shayna: Turn

And yes, she alighted somewhere near the
place she got onto the cab at.
Hahahah! YES!

By the time we got back to my place, and started falling asleep,
it was about seven in the morning!

Anyway! Sheila, shayna, sher and carrie!
Thanks for last night - looking out for each other all.
We shall do it sometime soon : )
Hahahahhahah!

-

Alright enough of that.
Staying over Shayna's now.
Mandy is really funny, oh my god she is!
I think I should be heading off to sleep soon.
Night!

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Those words you said in a moment of anger
will cause me an eternity of anguish.

Argh! FUCK YOU BASTARD!

Time and time again,
you caused me nothing but..
HURT!

Monday, December 26, 2005

And so, I'm back!
Iris, my cousin is staying over.
Both of my sisters are sleeping
in my room, together with her.
Man, my room is packed!

We'll be waking up early for
our cousins wedding and we're
still awake. Hoho!

Talking about my cousins wedding;
Shayna have been accompanying me
for the last two days just to look
for a gown.

Sorry if I was being such a fussypot,
which I'm sure I was.

Sunday, December 25, 2005

Hi everyone!
I'm back!

MERRY CHRISTMAS! : )
I'll update later.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Caroling's over!
It went pretty good, and I
am definitely gonna miss it.

-

These past few weeks have been busy,
with so many things to do, and
so many still left undone.

- Christmas Lightup rehearsals
- Christmas Lightup
- Caroling practices
- Caroling
- Church
- Tuition (Tues - Fridays, at 3)
- Basketball
- Work
- Penetential
- Mass
- Aunt's place soon, perhaps (She has been waiting)
- Shopping (Soon soon,I pray)
- Paying a visit to Granduncles/aunties (After christmas)

The list just continues.
I've been so busy,
I hardly even had time for myself,
I barely even went shopping.
And knowing me, shopping is
something I definitely wouldnt miss.
But its alright, I shall wait patiently for Friday.

Oh, and another 10 more days, and there goes my freedom.
GOODBYE FREEDOM, GOODBYE I SAY!

Oh well.
Christmas is in 4 days!
For now, I should just be looking forward to that.

Time is passing so quickly. OH GOD!
And so, Nigel from Forth Ave is leaving
for Australia for two years to study today.
So is Claire, for Bangkok for three days

Who knows,
maybe she might meet Pearl there?
Since its such a small world after all.

-

Lately, I've been craving to play computer games.
Just downloaded one, and I've started playing it.
Hoho, and I'd gladly say -
I am addicted to it! : )

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Its 5 days to christmas,
and 11 days to yr 2006

Argh FUCK! Time is passing so quickly,
and I've been having so much of fun lately,
I just dont want it to end.

As I've mentioned before,
I'm not looking forward to the new year at all.

Its going to be DIFFERENT!

I'm sorry,
but I'm just not used to changes.

Monday, December 19, 2005

I'm sick again.
Feeling all cold and,
fever's coming up!
Oh well!

Ice Skating was all good :
Prema, Ally, Feli, Nat, Augustine, Ben,
Dave, Debbie, Randall, Pauline, Stelli,
Brendan, Sammie, Gerald, Gabriel etc.

About five hours of Ice Skating,
with the freezing cold ice!
Man, it was good, all good! : )

Visted Shayna later,
since she was still sick.
Together with Toad, we were
fixing a 1000 piece jigsaw
of Jay Chou! Hahahahah.
Long way more to go,
long way more to go!

Toad and I just love keeping her in suspense!
- Soccer ball
- Night/Stars
- White/Red
- Shayna's room?
- Her sister's room?
- The hall?

Hahhahahahha! Its alright if you dont get it.
As long as Toad and I know, its all good! : )
In the meanwhile shayna: Have fun searching!
And no okay, I'm not bullying you, I'm not!

I shall be nice and give you a new clue - WOOD

-

I'm extremely tired!
Maybe I should head to sleep soon.
Tanning/swimming is cancelled tmr,
cos Toad can't make it!

Together with Toad, we're looking forward to Friday.
SHOPPING oh SHOPPING, here we come! : )
Its four days away, damn.

Oh hurry hurry hurry please!

-

Bona: Congrats on your N level results! : )

-

Would you take my hand and never let me go?
I miss you baby, come back quick!

CHRISTMAS LIGHTUP was such a blast! : )
I'm gonna miss acting as a warrior,
together with Prema, Feli and Ally!

I'm glad this lightup has brought some of
us closer together - Debbie, Dave, Tim,
Bona, Ally, Feli, Prema, Augustine, Jamie,
Sam, Geri, Tessa, Rachel etc.
(Sorry to those I've missed out)

The past few days have been spent with them :
- Christmas lightup rehearsals
- Prata at Jalan Kayu (supper)
- Rocking Xmas
- Dinner, etc.

And tmr, we will be going ICE SKATING! : )
And since I have this tendancy of oversleeping,
Tim and Dave will both be calling til I wake up.

But still, that depends you see.
Cos I might fall back to sleep after the call.
Hahahahhahahah.

So perhaps, I should be heading to sleep soon.
Before I get disturbed at seven in the morning!

-

That reminds me.
Christmas is barely a week away,
and I havent gone christmas shopping!
I am gonna end up without any clothes
for christmas! - This is so bad!

Oh! And Shayna's sick!
GET WELL SOON!
I'm waiting - Swimming/Tanning + shopping!
And how can I forget - monkey : )

We wont be able to do all of these, til you're well!
And I havent started christmas shopping!
Hurry hurry hurry! - GET WELL SOON!

-

Before I go - A picture taken yesterday at Rocking Xmas!

Kenneth

Will upload more soon!
NIGHT.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Yesterday's caroling photos are up!
Please click! - The photoblog

Actually, there are more.
But I'm too lazy to upload them.
Soon soon, I promise! : )

Anyway! Got home not along ago from supper at Jalan Kayu!
Christmas Lightup full dress rehearsal!
It went pretty good, I must say.
Looking forward to it - sunday!
Please please, do come! : )
It's really good!

BE THERE!
Once again.
Its on Sunday at 7.30pm
Church of Saint Vincent De Paul

ALL ARE WELCOME!
Its gonna be a wonderful play
With lovely christmas carols
from all the different choirs!
I promise you, it'll be good!

ROCKING XMAS is tmr!
I am excited!

Friday, December 16, 2005

Swimming/Tanning before caroling - with Toad and Shayna
It was fun, playing monkey with a 1.5litre water bottle
We're going back again on Monday : )
And then, Christmas shopping (finally!)

Now, my shoulders are RED, it hurts!
I didnt even know I was burnt
til I came home from caroling.

Talking bout caroling -
It was good! Hoho.

For now, I'm tired!
Many pictures to upload.
It'll be up soon, I promise!

GOODNIGHT!

-

You left! Left without a word!

I tried picking up the pieces.
But it just left me with more countless scars.

Spare me ALL your sweet talks, cos sadly,
I've had enough of them!
Just words, no actions.

Funny how it seems as if,
I've known you for the longest time.
Enough said,
there's nothing more I want to know
It just hurts!

I'm sorry, but things have changed!

Thursday, December 15, 2005

CHOCOLATES - makes me HYPER! : )
Oh yes, I'm a hyper active child!
Hahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahha!

Anyway! It is 3.30 in the morning!
and, Ching is making me laugh so hard.
She asked where I was working at,
so I told her: Serangoon Gardens

Ching: As a gardener?

OMG! She's really funny!

-

Christmas lightup is 3 days away.
Rehearsals after rehearals! Hope everything goes well! : )

Here are details: -

Church of Saint Vincent De Paul
Yio Chu Kang Road ; Jalan Kelulut
7.30pm

Please do come!
I promise you, it'll be good!

-

Christmas is next week!
I have yet to fufil my chirstmas shopping.
Currently - I only bought new heels

Christmas shopping is A MUST!
I have to go shopping soon, or else
I'm gonna end up without any
christmas clothings!

SHOPPING, here I come! : )

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

A video[edited] I made for the clique -
Played this after grad night
Sorry to those who weren't there

Please turn up your speakers!

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Feeling a little better esp after
a day spent with the basketballers.
Chicken Little!, DDR, Daytona, Time Crisis,
Pool, Photography, Christmas lightings etc.

Thanks guys! : )

Monday, December 12, 2005

Today marks the last day of work - I'm finally free!
Just a few hours ago - I was counting down to eleven
Now, a few hours later - I am free, knowing I wont
have to face that bitch anymore!

Now that I'm no longer working, its time for me to
do some real catching up with my girls - I miss them

School is starting;
Its high time I get this brain working.

Its high time I start going for tuition
frequently and, its high time I make my
way down town, fufiling my christmas shopping!

Today, while working, I met someone.
HHAWWWWT, I'd gladly say!
What an eye candy, really.
Now sheila, stop laughing at me.
And yes, you're the only one that knows.

-

Tears I try hard to hold back
Maybe I should just go to bed and not bother
It was likely just another empty promise you made again anyway.

I was naive.
I believed you.
Call me stupid.
Whatever you wish.

Tomorrow will be better, I suppose.
Lunch/Shopping/Movie with the bballers.

Friday, December 09, 2005

As much as you want me to be happy
I want that of you too.
And I'm sure you are - with her
Thats good! : )

Sometimes, no matter how hard we try to
go back to the past and search.
We'll never be able to find it,
for whatever that was lost
a few years back, can never
ever be found again.

A torn shirt, even after mending it,
will still show evidences of stitching.
The same for a broken glass -
The cracks will stay visible,
no matter how you try hiding it.

And so I thank you for the past two years
Those moments you never failed to bring
the smiles and laughters into my life
You have been an awesome friend/confidante
But sadly, things have changed.

All the best with her then : )

-

Been've feeling really down as of late
The tears I try so hard to keep back.

Nothing's working.
They get up and simply walk away
And I am left all alone to pick up the broken pieces

Empty and all alone, I feel
I wish you'd take me away from here soon, Lord.
Somehow, I feel it was a big mistake
bringing me here in the very first place.

For there is nothing left
just a big huge gaping hole that cannot be filled.

Why, take away innocent lives?
I'd gladly exchange mine for theirs, really.
I find no meaning in my life anyway.

Words can never come close to describing
what I feel, or rather, how I'm feeling.
I sit here in silence

The weight, pressing down hard on me
As I am overwhelmed with emotions
I just wanna cry myself to sleep
and hopefully, never wake again

Theres a limit to everything
and well, you have certainly
crossed the line.

I just never expected to hear
such words from you - a family member

How much hurt that one statement held.
I'm sorry, but you have hurt me deeply.
And for that, I dont see why I should
continue respecting you.

-

Nothings making it any better
I miss the friends, the clique

I wish I could talk to someone about it
Sheila's at camp, Shayna's away.
Everyone's busy.
Argh, FUCK!

I'm forced to fake a smile and laugh
everyday of my life.

For now, I'll just continue living
behind this mask.

Til my time here is up,
I hope to be spending enough time
with each and every single one of you'll.

-

PARTNER oh PARTNER! The OC soon please?

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Last night; Ladies Night
It was one helluva havoc night, I swear.
Shant go into details.

On a lighter note;
- The christmas tree is up!
[With the combined effort of the twins, dad and I : )]

- And finally, my pay! : )

Hoho! Christmas is coming, and
I am so very excited!

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Was just talking to Sheila on the phone
Glad she's always there,
listening to my crap (:

Watched Saw2 earlier - along with Toad and Shayna
BLOODY SADISTIC, it was! Just plain GROSS!
Was telling Sheila how gross it was and all,
and that IDIOT was so totally amazed!
She was complaining to me how much
she wanted to catch it, but was with
Jen, who caught the show twice alr!

Sorry, but I can't help thinking how
someone could actually watch such a show twice!

I mean, the show was just so awfully gross,
even the three of us couldn't wait for it to end!
Haha, I'm serious! I wouldn't mind watching it
again with Sheila - if only it was another show.

It was fun with Toad though!
Cos we were laughing and laughing so much
during the advertisements that my stomach
ached so badly, even before the show began.
Hahahahah.

Bball and soccer this morning
Sun was so HOT, and I played
like shit! Rahh!

On a brighter note; something to be looking forward to -
NATASHA LIEW'S RETURN!
She'll be back in a few hours time!
I SO CAN'T WAIT!

Late hangout nights at Jalan Kayu with
our all time favourite Milo Dinosaur,
Blockcatching at Green, movie marathons
at her place etc. it shall be! (:

Damn, I miss that girl!

-

Anyway it has come to Mel's and my attention
that many have been asking whether we're
together, whether I like her and what not

And.

NO, we're not together and yes I do like her, BUT
only as a very good friend of mine! (:
Now now, I hoped that answered your questions.

-

I aint good handling all these
Please be gentle with me

Thanks, but I dont need ~~you~~

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Have no idea what went wrong with the mouse
All of a sudden, its seems so strange
It was alright yesterday, and now it
decides not to work well. Annoying!
OH WELL!

Anyway.
Training this morning - boring
Mostly on physical conditioning,
penalty and three-pointers.
The only thing that kept me
going was Deb and how much
of an IDIOT she can get!
Together, we kept laughing
and laughing away.

But of course, Mr Tan wasn't very
happy with us, laughing.

After training, went for lunch
with Sherlyn, Ana and Guanyu.
And then - HOME for a nice
good bath and SLEEP!

Work after which.
Mel was not scheduled,
but yet she came along
with Mitch, Gen Wan and gang.
How very nice of her: to give me a surprise!
Haha. Thanks dear! (:

CHOW; Please please please STOP thinking too much. Rest well and get well soon okay! Remember, I want to see you when I come for training on Friday! Take care! :D

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Alone at home, with the twins.
Parents are out at OCC with aunties,uncles and grandma
discussing about the upcoming event - my cousins wedding!

Spent the afternoon at Marina/Suntec - Christmas shopping,
after dad sent mom off for her aerobic class.
We went to Swensens for ice cream
before we continued looking around
for clothes again

Ended up with heels from Charles and Keith
And then off to fetch mommy from her class
before heading home for STAR AWARDS!

The NEW BED arrived today
Comfy and nice, it is (:

So, Claire and all ended up not playing BLOCKCATCHING
Cos the stupid guys were too tired from soccer

Talking bout SOCCER;
This is so embarrassing - GREEN CARD!
Shan't go into details
Just read the following
You'll understand -

when you lose something you can't replace says:
i bet u didnt noe that theres green card nw right?

when you lose something you can't replace says:
im quite sure of that

when you lose something you can't replace says:
hahaha

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
OH YES GREEN CARD

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
I know

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
Just that it slipped off my mind for a second, and now its BACK

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
(:

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
Hahaha.

when you lose something you can't replace says:
OMG STACE!

when you lose something you can't replace says:
hahahahaha

when you lose something you can't replace says:
it's red card la!

when you lose something you can't replace says:
i bluff u about the green card!

when you lose something you can't replace says:
OME

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
OH! RED CARD

when you lose something you can't replace says:
OMG

when you lose something you can't replace says:
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
EH

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
I KNEW OK

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
RED CARD

when you lose something you can't replace says:
shit i must blog abt that

when you lose something you can't replace says:
WAHAHAHAHA

when you lose something you can't replace says:
shit damn funny

Now, that was embarrassing enough
Yet it still had to continue -

when you lose something you can't replace says:
goodnight!

when you lose something you can't replace says:
dream of football and green card yes?

when you lose something you can't replace says:
hahahaha

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
Hahaha. I'm off to sleep tooo! AND I WONT DREAM OF GREEN CARD

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
NOT EVEN RED CARD

when you lose something you can't replace says:
hahahahahahaha

shakeit-@hotmail.com says:
OR YELLOW CARD

when you lose something you can't replace says:
i will!

when you lose something you can't replace says:
i will dream of u as refree holding a green card

when you lose something you can't replace says:
HAHA

Yes, stop laughing at me!
I shall head off to sleep
on my COMFY BED

And NO, i shall NOT dream
of anything with regards to SOCCER!

She can happily go dream of
a refree holding a green card!
HAHA!

-

Before I go,
New photos up :PHOTOBLOG

- Gathering at Aunty Phyllis's
- Confirmation 2005

More photos will be up soon
For now, GOODNIGHT!

Friday, December 02, 2005

I've been waiting for this day, together with Claire.
BLOCKCATCHING, it was all planned
Where we'd give no shit about anything,
and just have all the fun in the world.

But, sadly. I can't make it ):
Cos I'm down with fever
Oh, what a spoiler!

I bet they're having the best times of their lives, right now!
ARGH.

Anyways.
I've been staying up late these few nights.
I either can't get to sleeep,
or I'll be at work til past 1am.
And by the time, I bathe, wait
for my hair to dry, surf the net
etc, its almost 3am

I'm not surprised I'm sick, really.

Slept at 4am last night
Woke up at 7 for training.
Felt so uncomfortable, I almost cried.
Realised I was down with fever,
so ended up not going for training.

Didnt go back to sleep.
Instead, I spent almost the entire day
packing my room til it was time for church.

On a brighter note : DAD and I painted my room today. Actually, I just watched, he did most of it (: Hahahah. OOPS!

I think we're mad.
We just painted it ORANGE during the June hols.
And now, we painted over the orange! Hahahah, yes!
Photos will be up soon.

Oh yes, and my NEW BED'S arriving tmr!
THIS IS SO VERY EXCITING!
Just have no idea which part
of the room to place it yet.

Haha, alright! I'm tired!
Off for the awful medicine,
and A LONG GOOD SLEEP's just what I need!

GOODNIGHT!

-

Feeling like fuck lately
You're not helping much either
In fact, you're making it worse
Thank you

imabitch